Anyone who imagines that Bankstone’s top bras spend their entire time swanking around at an endless succession of lavish corporate jollies is only half right.

Why only the other day all three of them were hard at their posts slaving avidly at the daily grindstone. The day after that, however, anyone who thinks they might have spotted any or all of the infamous three amigos at the Sparks ASA Celubrity Golf Challenge hosted by Matt Le Tizer at Dyrham Park Golf Club might be far from entirely incorrect.

They were there alright. They’ve admitted as much themselves, whilst hotly denying, of course, having actually done any of the things that anyone might tell you they did while they were there – unless they are good things, obviously, in which case, yes, they did.

What we can tell you for more or less certain is that Bankstone man Dickon Thigh-Soap was on a team with former Norwich and Scotland goalie Bryan Gunn and some Flux people, whilst Andy “A-Jay” Jones and Mark “M-Dubz” Woods somehow ended up on a team described to Bankstone News by Mr Thigh-Soap as Bankstone B, along with another unspecified Flux person and BBC Motorspouts commentator Steve Parrish, who is apparently quite funny. In a good way.

Not to say that any of the other persons just mentioned weren’t funny as well, which they were. Really funny, actually. But not excessively so, obviously.

We are keeping this story positive, because it’s about a deserving cause – i.e. the aforementioned Sparks, a children’s medical research charity, not to be confused with the popular musical ensemble of the same name, or the things you see flying off the severed ends of live electrical cables writhing around erotically like giant lust-crazed killer serpents amidst the violent tumult of a cataclysmic wind and rain storm, or off your Blakeys, for example.

Anyone who had ever been anyone in the world of sports was there, including Pat Clemence and Ray Jennings, Dave Peasant and Luther Blisset, the acclaimed author of controversial Italian historical novel Q, amongst other accomplishments.

Aside from an ugly spat involving nails-hard female sports presenter Geordie Bingham and Comedian Mark Wonker at the after party, the day was an unalloyed triumph and raised loads of money for a most excellent cause.

Will that do?

A joke? Oh, OK.

Both Bankstone Teams nobly held off from scooping any of the prizes their ample talents might so easily have secured them. Dickon Thigh-Soap did however admit to having been tempted to award himself the prize for longest drive, having travelled over 210 miles in three and a half hours to be there on the day!


Spot the ball, or Mr Tysoe as he prefers to be called.


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